When I taught leadership, I always advised the boss to look inward first, when something went wrong. Many a breakdown at the end of the line is caused by action at the top of the line. Often, it’s a lack of oversight or misunderstanding of how things really work. Today, the norm seems to be to blame first. Are you part of the blame game? Or have you found a better way to play?
Blame – #369
Therapists report that many young people are convinced their lives should be better and that someone else is to blame.
Older people see things changing around them, few of which they can control. Someone must be at fault for this.
The result seems to be fluency in the language of blame, complaint and grievance. We seem to have painted over the mirror that we should be looking into, to find the solutions to our problems. It’s maddening . . . and totally unproductive.
I saw a poster recently that read, “The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.” I hope it was meant to be funny – but I wonder.
Unfortunately, blame is like anger; it dulls your sense of empathy. It seems to give permission to act in a hurtful or abusive way or simply to be selfish.
Maybe it’s time for us all to stop whining, stop looking for others to blame.
Suck it up, take a deep breath and take control. Make YOU the person willing to take the blame and change those things that are negative. Then take the blame for the good things that start coming your way, once you take charge.
Hold that mirror up and take a good look – at the culprit, and the hero. They are both right there before you.
Looking in the mirror is the first step to making things better. Admit what you could have done to avoid the bump in the road. Invite others to admit what they could have done. Decide together how to make it better next time. Let everyone become the hero.