Memories and Aging Well

Prevent or Treat?

Backstory

As they sought to save us from the ravages of Covid 19, modern medicine invested in treating the disease. That’s what you do. I keep wondering how we could have done better. Then I learned about preventive medicine and a light went off.

Prevent or Treat?

Take responsibility for your body! It’s today’s message from the medical community. Rather than waiting until something happens and then treating it, the idea is to make changes that will prevent illness or disease. The concept is changing the future for today’s young people. And folks of every age can benefit from it.

For the last hundred years, doctors have had the responsibility of treating the sick. Today, they’re trying to work with their patients to prevent them from getting sick in the first place. What a concept!

Now, as never before, we have so much information on staying healthy that we cannot ignore the facts. Admit it, we know what should be done. We just don’t want to get out there and do it. But we all have to start making the right choices.

Educate yourself of the ways to diet and exercise. Smoking, drinking and stress all affect your health. Make the necessary corrections to improve your choices. Recognize that so much of declining health is not given to you, you give it to yourself by the way you eat, think, smoke, or sit still.

Decide today not to be a victim. Start practicing preventive medicine rather than seeking remedies later. Take responsibility for your own health and well-being. It could pay off for more good days with those you love.

P.S.

As we reset into post-pandemic mode, let’s create the mind-set of prevention rather than treatment with a whole new set of personal health standards.

[Show #545]

Haves and Have Nots

Backstory

In these months of constantly present hidden threat, optimism tends to wane, along with thankfulness. Reflecting on our state reminded me of an earlier time, when Americans were left without jobs and without income. This story is about that time for my family and what we learned.

Haves and Have Nots

“Be thankful for what you have, not for what you don’t have.” I first heard that mantra back in the 70’s. Be thankful for what you have, not for what you don’t have.

At the time, we were living in our first house. It was a nice three-bedroom split level in a residential development. But somehow after a few years, the house seemed small. We needed more garage space, more bedrooms. I wanted bigger, better.

Then the recession hit. Security became very wobbly. The things I had assumed I deserved and would always be mine were being challenged. I might not have a job. My husband might not. Oh boy, how I wish I had those hundreds of dollars we spent on last year’s vacation.

Suddenly I looked around my beautiful, perfect, plentiful home and said, “Please God – Just let us keep up the payments. Let us keep this roof over the heads of our children.”

Well, we did survive. The whole country did. Things turned around and we did eventually move on. But I never forgot the lesson I learned then. It may help you too.

Be thankful for what you have, not for what you don’t have.

P.S.

While sheltering in place during the pandemic, we have been thankful for thoughtful outreach, small and large. A team of walkers have a favorite route through our community. We sometimes glimpse them at wave distance. One day as they jogged through, they left candy and hand-written notes of blessing on porches. Gestures like that, especially from strangers, really make a difference. They remind us of the joy, friendship and kindness waiting on the other side.

[Show #108]

What Love Is About

Backstory

This is a very personal and precious memory of once upon a time. Days and months and years have passed, but my soul still smiles at how it felt just to have him in my mind.

What Love Is About – #452

Sometimes I’m just sitting and doing my work, a thousand thoughts fluttering across my brain, frantically trying to capture the ideas appropriate to the moment with a project at hand. Suddenly the memory of his smile spreads across the cluttered landscape of my mind and I have to stop and smile back.

It helps keep me from reverting to the old workaholic habits. It makes me pace myself and stop taking it all so seriously. It makes me glance at the clock to count the hours until I can see that smile in person and feel that embrace and give back and enjoy every moment of it.

I know that we will share whatever circumstances the day has caused. Physical pain, frustration, laughter, success, or just quiet contentment for another day’s work done. It makes a difference when he is near. The very air I breathe is better, sweeter, fresher, more invigorating. He is the backdrop for my daily joy in life.

So this is what love is all about. It’s all about how the other person makes you feel. Special, loved, treasured. Why didn’t someone tell me sooner!

P.S.

Is it OK to have such thoughts of someone from the past, if you now have a new love? Oh my, yes. Love always deserves to be remembered. Not flaunted, but quietly, reverently remembered and enjoyed.

[Show #452]

The Art of Downsizing

Backstory

Just how to start downsizing. That was the question. Most families realize that at one time or another, they’re going to need smaller space that will only accommodate less “stuff.” That time finally arrived for us and here’s how we went about it.

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The Art of Downsizing – #608

I gave away seven gaily painted nutcrackers and ten wooden toys. They were part of our Christmas decorations, as the children were growing up, and long after. I took them to the family Christmas party and invited each grandchild to choose some. The Christmas angels will be shared next year. It’s the start of our household downsizing phase. A very small start, but definitely a beginning.

What’s next? Bill’s ancient electronics are definitely on the table. For decades, they were treasures. In the age of computerized electronics, they are archaic. Then we’ll go on to the household items of which we have too many.

Friends warned that downsizing would not be easy. I envisioned delighting locals with a yard sale where they could find great stuff for pennies on the dollar. Then we considered how much work that is. Maybe it’s time to call in Junk Monster instead. You pay him to take it all away.

I have heard it said about material things – First you wish you had them, then you own them, then they become a burden. That’s where we are.

When Bill and I combined our households, five truckloads of furniture, books, domestics and glassware went to the church thrift shop. I hope they have room for more stuff, because I feel it going their way, as we shrink our belongings and organize our life for a simpler time.

P.S.

I am pleased to say that we resisted the temptation to rent storage lockers as a final resting place for our stuff. We have seen friends pay heavy money over time to secure belongings eventually tossed or sold at auction. Even worse, to will stuff to heirs who move it to their own stowage in the absurd cycle of life-long holding.

[Show #608]

Losing Love

Backstory

Heading into retirement years, many of my friends have now led several different lives – more than one marriage, multiple careers, cultures in different parts of the country or the world. Included in their decades of living is loss. Yet they seem to have recovered and moved on. They told me how it works.

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Losing Love #167

The county song says that unanswered prayers may be our greatest blessing. That’s hard to swallow when you lose love. But whether it disappears, dies, or is dismissed, losing love is painful. The only saving grace is to learn from the lesson and apply it, the next time around.

Why did love go wrong? So often, that question is answered by pointing fingers. But if we look deeply into our hearts and souls, we might find important factors.

Sometimes we love too much and it’s smothering. Sometimes we miss the cues for what’s important to the other person. The saddest mistake is when we revert to bad behavior. We’re determined to never do that again and it comes out, just the same.

Should you lose love, at least don’t lose the lesson. Keep it to improve, the next time love comes your way.

P.S.

Recognize the different types of love that surround you. Romantic love is nice. But don’t underestimate the practical love of friends who are there for you. Great warmth can come from your grandchildren or somebody else’s grandkids. Volunteers find love and satisfaction in the service they perform. If you’ve lost love, stay open to all kinds of fresh new love.

[Show #167]

Using Your Gifts

Backstory

If you love what you do for a living, you will never work a day in your life. I have found that to be so true. It happens when you use the gifts you were given.

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Using Your Gift – #637

What’s it all about? Why are we put here on this earth? What is expected of us?

There comes a time in life when you start asking those questions and looking for answers. I have. Perhaps you have too.

Each of us have been given different gifts and I believe we are expected to use them to make the world a better place. Some of us can affect things on a global scale, others have little influence beyond our own kitchen. But I think we fulfill our destiny when we figure out our God-given gifts and use them daily for the better good.

God didn’t impart them to you just to hang around. He expects you to use them. Whether you are playing the piano, crocheting afghans, tending flowers, curing diseases, or kissing children good night. You do it very well.

You may be the organizer, or the one who comes up with the good ideas. Or the one who moves things from discussion to action. Your gift may be that you can give of your time, or your money.

Choose the big world or your small intimate world and go make it a better place. It’s expected of you and it pleases God when you do.

I like what Maya Angelou said about this, “My mission in life is not merely to survive but to thrive and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style.”

P.S.

My jobs have always involved writing, composing, presenting thoughts to the world. I was sure my children appreciated the intellectual significance of what I create at that keyboard. Then I heard someone ask my son what I do for a living. He responded, “She types.”

[Show #637]