married Archives - CONSIDER THIS with Annette Petrick

Backstory

It’s Valentine’s Day so of course, my thoughts are of love. This story is a dramatic celebration of love. The words started flowing as I began exploring this elusive emotion and what it feels like and who has it. Clearly stream of consciousness. I hope it brings you joy.

Valentine’s Day Thought

I’ve been trying to grab the feeling of being in love and loved. It’s something so ethereal as to defy description. It makes the very air I breathe sweeter, safer, more nourishing. Look at it from a practical standpoint. If I did not love someone so much and he did not love me, I would still have my same body, my same mind. I would still have the same values to build on and the same education, and age, and looks. But somehow they are all better because I love, and am loved.

You know what amazes me the most? All I have to do to deserve all this love is to be; to exist. To live one day after the other. Just by doing so, I seem to earn his love and devotion.

Am I being silly? Is – is this something unique to me? Or – what a wonderful thought – are there hundreds, thousands, millions of people out there who are as loved as you are, and I am?

Well, my goodness. I think that’s the case. Millions of people are loved and in love. We all experience this wonderment of the soul. I want to meet them all. I want to shake their hands and congratulate them and share their joy. And if you are one of them; oh my, but we are the lucky ones.

P.S. You may have noticed that I never know what to do with the punctuation in our stories – especially since thoughts are often not full sentences. At least my shortcomings don’t show if you are listening to the weekly story or hear it on the radio.

[Show #381]

Backstory

This is a story you will relate to if you have been married for a long time. If not, let it be some good advice to assure that your marriage lasts a long time.

It’s about dealing with one of those things that maddens you about your partner. You know the kind of thing. It’s totally insignificant, in the big picture. No, it will not matter, five years from now. And yet you wish against wish that he just would not do that, or that she would remember to do that.

Isn’t it funny; the things we choose over which to get upset? It could be an issue left over from childhood. It could be a reminder of an embarrassing incident or one that you would rather forget. Could be something that goes against your values to the point where you want to explode.

Seems the woman in our story came up with an even better idea. See if you agree with her strategy.

Because She Loves Him

They were leaving that day for a few weeks in Florida. The wife had made her lists, put her stuff together, had check marks on just about everything on the list, and was ready to go.

The husband . . . well, he was still deciding which fishing poles to take. The car had not gotten washed as he planned and not everyone was informed of what was expected of them while the couple was away.

She could find it maddening. Why hadn’t he spent his time doing his share? She could yell . . . Bang around . . . Scold him and put him down.

Instead, she went and read a book, ignoring the sounds of his hustling. You see, she loves him. And she found out years ago that he is who he is. And not being ready on time is one of his traits. She could hate it and fight it or she could find a way to cope.

So she stretches the truth a bit, telling him they have to leave at noon, when the actual ETD is 2 p.m. She knows that with a few extra hours, he’ll almost be ready. She’ll then gently remind those things he was most likely to forget, and they’ll be on their way – perhaps a little late but happy.

Sounds like a 1950’s sitcom strategy. But it works, because she loves him enough to accept him as he is and to be a managing partner, when necessary.

What a wise woman. A master at turning lemons into lemonade. This is the essence of love.

P.S. This story explored strategies to handle the frustration. What do you do about it? Talk it through? Holler and throw dishes? Get angry and sulk? None of those is known to result in positive outcomes. So maybe you take up kickboxing or pull out your Crayolas and adult coloring book, or hire a therapist.

[Show #265]