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I was thinking about the benefits of growing old. There’s wisdom and experience, and being able to take it easy. But there are also benefits you might not think of right off hand.

Take kidnapping for instance. Well, kidnappers don’t seem to be very interested in old people. That’s a plus. And if you ever get in a hostage situation, chances are you’ll be released first.

When you get old, no one expects you to run; anywhere. Of course, older person’s stereotypes can be annoying too. People call at 9:00 pm or 9:00 am and ask, “Did I wake you?” Come on…

On the other hand, there’s nothing left to learn the hard way. You can eat supper at 4:00 pm if you want. And pay less too! You can live without sex, but not without your glasses.

You get into heated arguments about pension plans. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.

Your investment in your health insurance is finally paying off. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the National Weather Service. And your secrets are safe with your friends, because they can’t remember them either.

And that’s the way it goes…

[Show #459]