Advice and Encouragement

Retirement – A Second Chance

Backstory – Retirement

Looking around at retired friends, I marveled at how active and involved they are. No rocking chair sitters, these. Taking a better look, I thought about what an opportunity retirement is to reinvent yourself. That thought inspired this week’s show.

Consider This Show – Second Chance

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Second Chance – #621

You know what’s great about retirement? It gives you a second chance at having an authentic life.

Thank goodness baby boomers are strong and healthy, well into their sixties, seventies and even their eighties – something our grandparents could not even wish for. They were tired at 50 and spent at 60. That’s not the case today.

So when folks retire, they have a second chance to have an authentic life, if it didn’t work for them the first time around. And they have the wisdom of experience, to enhance their success.

I have many friends who are enjoying a new authentic life, since retirement.

A non-profit executive from NYC – opened a flower shop in California, something she had always wanted to do.
A retired nurse became a care-giver.
A retired public speaker started writing a 90 second radio show. You’re listening to it right now.
A physicist started studying the Russian language. He traveled to Moscow to test his linguistic skills. There he found access to opera and ballet at the price of a box lunch in NYC. He keeps going back for more.

Whether your work life was authentic or not, in retirement, you could start out on a new path, if you want.

Psychologist Carl Jung told us, “The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” And life after retirement offers that privilege, a second time around.

[Show #621]

One Gift

Backstory – One Gift

We were talking about beauty. Standard wisdom is that beauty fades. Actually, it depends on what you consider beautiful. And that depends on whether your eyes are on something or someone who is loved or simply seen. This story was the result of that reflection.

Consider This Show – One Gift

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To Whom Are You Beautiful? – #458

I heard a wife tell her husband, “If I could give you one gift in life, I would give you the ability to see yourself through my eyes. Only then would you realize how special you are to me.”

It truly is a gift to be seen through the eyes of love. We are beautiful, in the eyes of those who love us. And if we’re lucky, that person tells us often how much we are loved and cherished, and how beautiful we are – man or woman.

I so enjoy when you can see, just by looking at them, how much a couple care about each other. It is particularly true when they have been together for a long time.

At a recent community meeting, someone announced that a couple was celebrating their 45^th wedding anniversary. The husband stood up and added, “And I am still in love with her!” The spontaneous announcement was so touching, as his bride blushed at the public attention.

But he didn’t even need to say it out loud. You could tell by the loving way he treated her, that she was still that beautiful, flirtatious young woman who had captured his heart so many decades ago. That’s what HE saw when he looked at her, regardless of the whitened hair and wobbly knees that had become today’s reality.

To see them together was to believe in love all over again.

[Show #458]

Something Bad Could Happen

Backstory – Something Bad Could Happen

Something bad could happen. There’s no denying it. Turn on the news for proof any time. How can you possibly keep from worrying in times like these? That thought inspired this story.

Consider This Show – Something Bad Could Happen

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It’s easy to get swept away by the bad news: someone is treated badly; someone is swindled out of their life savings, the life is savagely snuffed out of a good person, a young life is lost.

Knowing about the bad things that could happen can sometimes be scary. It can get us to a place where we are waiting for the next shoe to fall. When will it be OUR TURN to experience something bad? It could be around the next corner. And it COULD!

But most likely, there will be something good around the next corner. Remember that the media has to pull bad news from all around the country and the world, just to keep us informed.

It’s not news that 16 million school children arrived safety. T here’s no headline in knowing that 45 million husbands chose to come home to their families and share their lives tonight. The fact that 34 million of them were met with a hug and a smile; you’ll never hear Fox News report it.

So take the news with a grain of salt.Something bad did happen to them. It could happen to you.

And if it does, you have the strength and courage to figure out how to handle it.

In the meantime, enjoy the everyday good times. Treasure them. Don’t let them get by without celebration. They are what this good life is all about.

[Show #322]

Courtesy Close In

Backstory – Courtesy

In our adult, two-person family, kind words are natural and spoken often. I wondered how good we were about being kind to each other as the kids were growing up. I remember one request for politeness that worked. I asked one day that everyone ask, “May I be excused?” before leaving the dinner table. It stuck, and from then on, they did. Go figure!

Consider This Show – Courtesy

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I was coming around the corner in the grocery store. So was he. Whew . . . close call with our carts. “Excuse me,” he smiled. “No problem,” I replied with a smile as generous as his. We were so kind and polite to each other, we two strangers. I was proud of us both.

But sometimes we forget to be equally polite to the people we love and who mean something to us. A child approaching while you’re fixing dinner may hear, “Watch out; get out of the way.” A wife reaching for a kiss during the football game may be waved off. A teenager arriving home with the groceries may be greeted with, “It’s about time you got back” Instead of “Thanks for making that trip.”

We expect that those close to us will accept this kind of behavior. After all, we can’t go around the house muttering “Please, thank you, excuse me” – all day long. Can we? Why not?

Why treat strangers in a kinder and more polite way than those we love?
Practice thinking and saying those special words around the house. Practice courtesy towards those you love!

Please . . . thank you . . . excuse me. It will be such a joy when the new kinder gentler you takes hold.

And when you find the words being used by children and grandchildren too . . . well, that’s when you know you’ve made your corner of the world a slightly little better place.

[Show #336]

Twas the Night

Backstory – ‘Twas the Night

Surely you know the traditional Christmas poem, A Visit from St. Nicholas, written by Clement Clarke Moore in 1822. My version acknowledges the tens of thousands of grandparents who find themselves raising grandchildren. Safe to say that few expected to spend retirement years caring for young’uns. This poem is a loving Christmas salute to them all.

Consider This Show – ‘Twas the Night

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‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,
The sound of kids laughing reached the wife and her spouse.

These folks, in their sixties, that is apparent,
Did not expect filling their days as a parent.

But fate somehow chose them, to do it again,
One child or more, badly needing a friend.

They didn’t expect, at retirement age,
To be moms and dads, and not turning the page.

But children need love and attention galore,
And there they were standing, right at their front door.

So, here’s to the grandmas still braiding young hair,
And learning of Sponge Bob with pants that are square.

And grandpas at soccer and football and such,
Your love and devotion are meaning so much.

The kids keep you whirling around and about,
By day’s end, you’re sometimes completely worn out.

You’ve learned about iPods and lap tops and cell phones,
American Idol, the GaGa and ring tones.

You’ve put in your time at the pool and the park,
And soothed little people afraid of the dark.

Here’s wishing you strength in these rushed, busy days,
When hours rush by in a holiday haze.

Santa may bring you some sleep as your gift,
Along with the toys that you sort, wrap and lift.

He’s seen all your efforts through these many days,
He said God has seen too and sends you His praise.

And I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
Granny and Papa, now have a good night.

[Show #255]

Describing Your Job

Backstory – Describing Your Job

What a unique opportunity we have, when someone asks how you are employed. You can just give the standard answer – I am a nurse, a housewife, an architect, etc. Or you tell the RESULT of what you do. Thinking about the possibilities resulted in this week’s show.

Consider This Show – Describing Your Job

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What do you respond when someone asks, “What do you do for a living?” If you sell cars, you might say – “I sell cars for a living.” Or you might dress it up a bit and say – “I provide transportation.” Or “I put people in shiny new vehicles that make them happy and safe.” It’s all in how you think about yourself.

Earlier in my career, I overheard someone ask my children what kind of work their mother does. They were completely transparent and replied, “She types!” Well, that’s all they had ever seen me do. They had no idea that the words being typed were my own; that keystrokes on the page were actually influence or encouragement or humor or lessons to be learned. It never occurred to me that I should explain to my kids what I was doing when I typed.

One of our listeners recently gave me a new take on what I do as the writer and presenter of Consider This shows. She said I am “a happiness aficionado.” I like it! OK. That’s what I am.

Now, what are you?

Think of a really creative way of describing what you do for a living and write your comment below. Think about how you make the world a better place, every day. And let me know. I’ll be here waiting for you . . . typing away.

[Show #437]

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