Advice and Encouragement

Sharing Something of Value

The Chinese have a saying – “When someone shares with you something of value, you have an obligation to share it with others.” You could apply that to many things – knowledge, money, gratitude, even smiles.

Imagine considering it an obligation to smile at someone else, every time someone smiles at you. The question is whether a smile is something of value. What do you think?

I remember hearing that a smile is an instant face lift. And indeed, a smiling face is so much more attractive than one with a frown drawn on it.

Watch attractive elderly women. They know the secret of the face-lifting smile. You will rarely see them without a smile on their lips. And you can’t help thinking how lovely they are.

What else do you receive of value that should be shared?

We Americans are generous with sharing our wealth; from donations to the Red Cross and Salvation Army, to funding of Wounded Warrior to individual help provided anonymously when we hear there is a need. To those who receive much, much is expected.

We seem to have learned the Chinese lesson well, although it never hurts to be reminded.

[Show #450]

Empty Bowl Supper

During a time when the economy is stagnant and unemployment high, charity is not at the forefront of many people’s priorities. But some organizations have fund raisers that work for them consistently.

One of them, in the Shenandoah Valley, is the Alliance for Shelter. For some 20 years, they have sponsored the annual Empty Bowl Supper, with the help and cooperation of lots of other groups.

Potters throughout the valley create hundreds of bowls. Your ticket to the event buys you a bowl of soup and a couple of cookies. It’s a reminder that this is a typical dinner for far too many folks. The catch is – you get to keep the hand-made bowl. Over the years, bowls have become real collectors’ items of intrinsic value to local residents.

High school students and scouts bake the cookies for the event. Ladies bake luscious home-made cakes that are bid on, in a live auction. Local restaurants provide dozens of gallons of soup of different kinds. Local craftsmen, stores and business people provide items for a silent auction. There is music and laughter and people don’t even mind the waits for a table.

The Alliance has created an event that is unique and appealing to city folks and country residents alike. And to think – it raises money besides.

Show #378

24th ANNUAL SOUP SUPPER AND SILENT AUCTION

Friday, Nov. 20, 2015 from 5:30 PM to 7:30 PM : Benefit dinner and silent auction at Central High School in Woodstock, VA

Bowls are created and donated by local craftspeople, and the bowl you choose is yours to keep!

Admission:
Adults $35.00 ($36 if purchased online)
Students (6 to 17) $20.00 ($21 is purchased online)

Tickets are available for the first time this year, online by visiting the website at www.allianceforshelter.org and clicking Empty Bowl Soup Supper.

Tickets can also be purchased at Woodstock Café in Woodstock, Sager Real Estate in Strasburg, Edinburg Mill in Edinburg, and Community Store in Basye, or reserve your tickets by calling Shenandoah Alliance for Shelter at 540-459-3212 or 540-459-8395. Tickets are limited to 300, so reserve your tickets early.

Tickets go on sale October 1, 2015.

American Hoarding

Is it a sign of our times that one of the television networks has a series based on hoarding – the compulsive retention of things that clutter the house even to the point of causing safety concerns?

It is amazing to see hoarding – in reality or on the TV screen. Piles of junk and what we would consider trash, flowing off table tops and bureaus and even sleeping places. Thank goodness most of us don’t get to the state where parting with old magazines causes an emotional melt-down.

But if we look around, chance are there are things we have not used for years . . . clothes that don’t fit . . . . gadgets we don’t use . . . things that no longer match our lifestyle.

What so many of us do is arrange more space to accommodate these cast-offs. Box them and put them in the attic. Build more shelves or bookcases. Rent a storage locker and pay monthly for the privilege of keeping our STUFF.

Maybe it’s time to look at things a different way. How about parting with this stuff? Ask your adult kids if they want any of it. When they turn you down, have a yard sale. Call a charity. Many will even come and pick it up.

Adopt a mindset of parting with what you don’t need, instead of keeping it or worse still, treasuring it. They say it’s freeing to give it up. Are you ready to try?

[Show #506]

Toy Library

Have you ever counted the toys your kids have? A well-known parenting guru suggests that the overabundance of toys possessed by kids today is not a blessing. He claims that an average American child has 150 toys. Think what that means in a family with 3 or 4 kids.

Overstimulation from the media, video games and noisy toys are creating chaos. The way out is to weed out your kids’ stuff.

Reduce the chaos and introduce calm. Give away outgrown toys: discard broken ones and pack a lot of the rest away.

There are coaches who get paid to come into a home and reduce the abundance. They remove as much as 75% of the children’s clothes and toys. You can do the same thing. That will reduce the clutter.

Then introduce the calm. Set up a schedule for watching TV or playing video games, rather than having both run 24/7 at will. Get rid of noisy, flashing toys. They actually do the playing for the child. Instead, provide toys that challenge the child’s imagination.

Create a veritable library of toys, to be checked out, played with In those periods of calm you created, and returned. Sounds like quite an improvement.

[Show #346]

Surviving Our Parents

Hey you kids out there, born and raised in the 40’s, 50’s or 60’s! Have you ever wondered how we managed to survive this far?

We were born to mothers who smoked or drank while they carried us. Our baby cribs were covered with bright-colored lead based paint. We had no child proof lids on medicine bottles or cabinets. We shared one soft drink among many friends and ate white bread and real butter. We spent pennies on candy and drinks that were pure sugar. But we stayed slim because we were always outside playing.

Boys got a BB gun for their 10^th birthday and nobody got their eye knocked out regardless of what your mom predicted. We rode our bikes without helmets, and hung our heads out car windows, untethered by seat belts. We even rode by the dozens in the open backs of pickup trucks whoopin’ and hollerin’ all the way to the swimming hole. And once there we swung by ropes from trees and dropped into the water wearing no water shoes.

Now, I’m not advocating this kind of fearless shenanigans. Just marveling at how we all survived them to tell about it. Things sure have changed.

But one thing is sure; kids, one day you will find that you survived your parents too!

[Show #214]

Raising Honest Children

Raising honest children today, I believe, is really difficult. There are times I think there is no more truth. Everything has a spin on it that benefits one group or another.

Telling the truth can get you into trouble. It can make your friends mad at you. It seems people want you to say what they want to hear, rather than what is honestly the truth.

If we are to teach our children to tell the truth, we have to create room for candor – for an authentic voice. We have to allow children to speak their mind, even if their thoughts or values differ from ours.

But when the value they are moving toward is not the truth, we need to show them how to grasp the truth and face it.

What happens when a child is caught in a lie? I believe we have to hold them responsible. We need to set firm, fair consequences and limits. The child who lies must suffer the consequences.

Discuss honesty in words the child can understand. Stories of rewards for telling the truth are effective.

The best lesson is MODELING honesty. Be willing to admit your own mistakes with the truth. Beware of hypocrisy – Don’t preach one thing and do another. Avoid calling the child a liar. Teach rather than scold. It works better . . . and that’s the truth!

[#426]

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