parenting

Just Like You

Backstory

The song was from the If You’re Going Through Hell album by country singer, Rodney Atkins. It was titled Watching You and it was released in 2006. It’s the tearjerker behind this story.

Just Like You

There’s a country song I love. A father is singing about his young son who lets loose with a profanity. “Where did you learn to speak like that?” the father demands. “From you daddy,” the child responds. “I wanna be just like you.”

Later in the song, the father is redeemed when he hears his son speak original words to God and asks where he learned to pray like that. “From you daddy”, the child responds. “I wanna be just like you.”

How often do we wonder where one of our children gets an attitude, or a prejudice, or passion? Often, we just need to look in the mirror to find the source. The things that you say and do everyday influence everyone around you; for the good, and for the bad.

So, when you decide what kind of stance to take, think twice about what you say. The position you take may well become the same one your children will carry into the next generation. You may never hear your child say, “Mommy, I want to be just like you.” But how often has it occurred to you, “Oh my God, I have become my mother” or “I have become my father.”

When that thought occurs to your child, make sure it makes them smile, not frown. And when your children become you, make sure they can be proud of the person they’ve become.

P.S.

In 2021, there is more need than ever for parents to display the traits you want offspring to emulate. Are you standing up against bullying? Have you explained ways to channel anger? Have you practiced conversations that respect all points of view? Kids are on a new playing field these days that may require patient consideration and discussion. Be sure your children can find that at home.

[Show #485]

Toy Library

Backstory

I could hardly walk through the room, for all the toys spread around. Looking at the broken plastic pieces, I could just imagine how much all this cost. But there was so much; it was overpowering. How best to organize toys and help children to appreciate them? We explore all that in this week’s story.

Click to listen or follow below to read.

Toy Library – #346

Have you ever counted the toys your kids have? A well-known parenting guru suggests that the overabundance of toys possessed by kids today is not a blessing. He claims that an average American child has 150 toys. Think what that means in a family with 3 or 4 kids.

Overstimulation from the media, video games and noisy toys are creating chaos. The way out is to weed out your kids’ stuff.

Reduce the chaos and introduce calm. Give away outgrown toys: discard broken ones and pack a lot of the rest away.

There are coaches who get paid to come into a home and reduce the abundance. They remove as much as 75% of the children’s clothes and toys. You can do the same thing. That will reduce the clutter.

Then introduce the calm. Set up a schedule for watching TV or playing video games, rather than having both run 24/7 at will. Get rid of noisy, flashing toys. They actually do the playing for the child. Instead, provide toys that challenge the child’s imagination.

Create a veritable library of toys, to be checked out, played with In those periods of calm you created, and returned. Sounds like quite an improvement.

P.S.

Toys Are Us just went out of business. One analyst said it was because kids would rather watch a YouTube video of kids playing, than play themselves. Playing is how we learned to imagine: how we learned to treat others; how we learned about the consequences of making a bad decision. How shall we replace those experiences in today’s world of busy thumbs and digital screens?

[Show #346]

What You Say Matters

My guy and I were just reminiscing about childhood. We were sharing incidents we still remember, half a century later. Why do certain things stick out so?

He recalled a 7^th grade teacher who showed him how to study and the benefits of learning. OK. That was a game changer.

But we also each recalled tiny incidents that should have been long forgotten, but were not.

My mom was rushed to finish a frock she was sewing for me. I was 8 years old. She put the dress on me to sew the final stitches, decided she didn’t have time and said she was going to hold the last stitch together with a safety pin. In her hurry, she stuck the pin right into me. It hurt – but not THAT much. Why do I still remember that silly incident?

I’ve mentioned before – the green imitation leather shoulder bag given to me by my aunt. It was an absolute treasure because it was woman size, when I had to grow quite a bit to get to that stage. I identified her as the first person in the world who realized that I was growing up and no longer a kid – even if the shoulder bag did hang down to my knees when I wore it.

Realize that YOU are making impressions like that on the young people in your life. You are saying things, and sharing experiences that people will remember a half century later. Yes, what you say matters. Be sure that what they remember is something good – or at least something funny.

[Show #497]

Salute To Young Mothers

It’s so difficult to be a young mother today. There are so many restraints on young mothers that require concern and worry. The media’s emphasis on negative happenings can convince you there is a boogey man around every corner! How do you teach children to be open and sociable – and yet wary of strangers, at the same time? Outside forces are influencing your children and they seem to get exposed to less gentle things so very early.

Yet in most families here in the country, there is a loving young mother doing her best to counteract the downsides: to make life safe and sweet and secure; to assure that her children know they are loved and the benefits of being good, obedient and respectful. It’s hard to know how much of an impression you are making. But you know what? Don’t stop!

Kids learn the lessons you are teaching. They learn from the examples you set by what you do and say. It will serve them well in the years ahead when they have hard choices to make. You are setting their moral compass and that’s never easy.

To those young mothers, accept this salute for the fine job you are doing as you juggle home, job, volunteering and most of all, caring for your children and helping them to grow and prosper, meeting each day’s challenges.

Thanks for all you do, young moms. Never give up. We’re counting on you!

[Show #292]