Laughter, Joy, and Gratitude

Be There

(Edited 3-24-19)

Backstory

Remember the days when “Party” was a call to arms? All aboard, and the louder the music, the better. Then we kind of settle down. Favorite get-togethers involve smaller crowds, family; people whose company we enjoy. After that comes the time when you may decide not to accept every invitation. It gets involved to get ready, arrange to get there, attend and get back. If you’re tempted to skip it, consider this.

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Be There – #603

Recently, I told you about the surprise birthday party in my honor. It lasted one afternoon. But the aftermath is what I want to share with you, because that event had a life of its own. It was like seeing a movie that keeps repeating in your head.

For weeks, I went to sleep remembering a vignette or a conversation or a hug shared that afternoon. I knew the memories of that day would be with me forever.

But the good part is that it gets to play over and over WITH OTHER PEOPLE as well. Every time I get together with a friend who was there, or a relative who helped plan or run the event, the warm rush of affection happens all over again. I hear what THEY took away; entirely different from what I did.

So the gift provided by the folks who planned and attended that surprise party did NOT fill just one afternoon. It became another story that is part of my life. How precious!

So I have a suggestion for you. If you are invited to a surprise party . . . or any such event . . . GO! Make the time, go out of your way to get there. Does it matter if you are in the crowd? Yes, it does.

You are giving the gift of time and sharing, to someone you care for, who no doubt loves you in return. The scope of the gift you provide by your attendance is immeasurable. It will pleasure the person honored with happy memories and provide stories to tell, for years to come. Don’t miss it. Be there.

P.S.

I just got one of those printed books that pile together all the photos posted on your Facebook page for the past year. Being someone who always forgets to take photos, I was delighted to see all those that others had posted on my page. What an easy, simple way to keep the memories of all those special events that were important enough to share with friends.

[Show #603]

Shedding Her Skin

(Updated January 13, 2019)

Backstory

In simpler days, people pretty much stayed who they were and where they were. If you were a farmer, you stayed on a farm. An attorney remained in the law. A nurse kept caring for patients. Today, the marvel of available education allows us to decide who and where to be, at any time during our life. You can reinvent yourself over and over during a long lifetime. Watching a friend do that, is what led to this story.

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Shedding Her Skin – #03

She was moving out of the home she had lived in for decades; feeling like a snake shedding its skin.

She hated leaving the well read books, but knew she had extracted from the musty bindings, all their wisdom and wizardry.

Parting with the clothes was hard. From bargains never worn, still bearing tags, to favorites now worn to a thread. And the photos; surely precious heirlooms, every one.

She packed boxes of souvenirs and somehow started to feel free. A burden lifted. A life simplified. Nothing important given up, just stuff now getting in the way.

As she lightened her load, she planned her future. What a surprise! The snake that shed its skin had morphed into a golden eagle, just beginning to spread her wings.

P.S.

We are so blessed to live to the current age. So many people in their fifties are switching careers or taking on entirely new tasks. Those of us in the sixties or seventies are reinventing ourselves at will, backed by the health, education and stamina to do so. My friend, the golden eagle, made her mark on the world after rediscovering her talents and abilities and gaining the courage to proclaim them. Have you done something similar?

[Show #03]

What Are You Waiting For?

Backstory

It didn’t happen just like that. There was a lot leading up to it. Joan had been in the presence of my fiancé and me for years – on vacations, on outings and at home. She was a careful observer. Now, it turns out, she was about to become a tentative adviser as well.

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What Are You Waiting For? – #639

What are you waiting for? That’s what Joan asked me. She had sat me down and said we had to have a serious talk. Bill and I had been engaged for some eight years. When I accepted his engagement ring, we both considered ourselves committed, one to the other. And that was that.

But Joan, who had been married for decades, pointed out that there is a difference.

She pointed out that my fiancé had never been married. She believed he would thrive in the status of being husband to a wife he loved. She wisely pointed out that we were not getting any younger. But I just saw no need for a big event and a lot of hoopla and spending money and bothering people to come together to celebrate. At our age, it seemed anti-climactic.

That’s when she took my hand and gave me her best advice. She said, “You are talking about the wedding. I am talking about being married. It’s two very different things.”

She pointed out that every day that passed was a day that we were not enjoying the definitive commitment, the ultimate allegiance. She said we owed it to each other to experience that. She strongly advised that I allow Bill to put the other ring on it.

I took to heart, everything she said. And decided she was right.

P.S.

Joan had said that seeing Bill happily married was on her bucket list – something she wanted to see happen before her time was up. She had known him for some 30 years. Long before I was on the scene. She was so pleased to check that off her bucket list. Another item on the list was a trip to Tuscany. She marked that one off too. She died in her sleep, the day after her return.

[Show #639]

Married

Backstory

“You’ve got to write about it,” said one listener. “I’ll be watching for the story,” said another. So now that the decisiveness of marriage has sunk in, I decided to fill the requests and tell you how the man finally got me to the altar, after eight years of keeping him waiting. It is this week’s story.

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Married – #640

In a recent story, I told how my friend Joan had encouraged me to let Bill put a ring on it. I was hesitant and she pointed out that time was passing and each day was one we could have enjoyed as husband and wife. She said, “You don’t want to run out of time!”

She was right, so I said to Bill, “About getting married, you want to do it now?” Like in time travelers, we were suddenly signing papers at the courthouse.

I called Joan and said, “On Friday, are you willing to drop everything and come be a witness at our wedding?”

She agreed in half a second. So did three other dear friends and there we were in front of an officiant, in the presence of God, saying our home made vows.

Bill was asked, “Do you take Annette . . .” and he responded with a really fast “yes,” before hearing the rest of the question. He was oh so ready to be a husband.

It was joyous, it was simple, it was fast and it was meant to be. Our home is full of love and each day is precious. And it happened because my friend Joan took the initiative to encourage us to see what was right before our eyes.

We should all be thankful for friends whose advice and guidance help us make better decisions in life.

P.S.

It was never that I didn’t want to be married. It’s just that everything was going along just fine. We had eight years with nary a bad day. There did not seem to be any need for improvement. But when I see the joy in his eyes when he calls me his wife. . . when I feel his sense of protection as my husband . . . Oh yes, this wedding was a good idea, Joan.

[Show #640]

Evening

Backstory – Evening

Retirement, with all its opportunities, can also lead to a life that is quieter, safer, softer. Can that lead to boredom? That was the concern of my beloved, when retirement was new to me and well experienced by him. This is the conversation we had about that.

Consider This Show – Evening

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We were sitting on the porch, watching the early evening clouds change color as sunset approached. He turned to me and asked, “Do you enjoy sitting here quietly, just taking it all in?” He referred to the mountains that rose from the other side of the road…the flowers in the swaying trees…the birds twittering happily in the evening shadows. “Sometimes I wonder if this is too staid for you,” he added.

How could I possibly express to him, all it meant to sit next to him and take in the daily miracles that so often go unnoticed in our hurried world. To hear the sounds of nature instead of the ringing of the house phone, the office phone, the cell phone. To sit there knowing this is the final destination of the day. No more need to wedge my way into the traffic and claim my share of blacktop to get me home. The most peaceful time of day when my heart sings and my hand touching his is divinely intimate. It is the essence of every love song.

“This is my favorite part,” I shared softly, tears of joy gathering in my eyes.

And I believe he understood everything expressed by those few little words.

[Show #198]

Something Bad Could Happen

Backstory – Something Bad Could Happen

Something bad could happen. There’s no denying it. Turn on the news for proof any time. How can you possibly keep from worrying in times like these? That thought inspired this story.

Consider This Show – Something Bad Could Happen

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It’s easy to get swept away by the bad news: someone is treated badly; someone is swindled out of their life savings, the life is savagely snuffed out of a good person, a young life is lost.

Knowing about the bad things that could happen can sometimes be scary. It can get us to a place where we are waiting for the next shoe to fall. When will it be OUR TURN to experience something bad? It could be around the next corner. And it COULD!

But most likely, there will be something good around the next corner. Remember that the media has to pull bad news from all around the country and the world, just to keep us informed.

It’s not news that 16 million school children arrived safety. T here’s no headline in knowing that 45 million husbands chose to come home to their families and share their lives tonight. The fact that 34 million of them were met with a hug and a smile; you’ll never hear Fox News report it.

So take the news with a grain of salt.Something bad did happen to them. It could happen to you.

And if it does, you have the strength and courage to figure out how to handle it.

In the meantime, enjoy the everyday good times. Treasure them. Don’t let them get by without celebration. They are what this good life is all about.

[Show #322]

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